Helping Toddlers Identify Feelings

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As a parent, you probably know what upsets your child and what makes them happy. Knowing these things helps you make your child’s world a happy and safe one. It is necessary, however, to teach children how to deal with unpleasant feelings like anger, sadness, and frustration, because as a youth and adult, this is a necessary skill that is needed for a happy life.

In order to understand and cope with our feelings, we must first be able to identify these feelings. Young children may not know if they are frustrated, sad, or frightened. They just know they don’t feel right and then the ensuing tantrum or acting out occurs.

A fun role playing game is to pretend we are actors. Let’s make a sad face. Then a happy face, a scared face, and a mad face. Toddlers love to mimic thier parents and enjoy this game. Also, talk about characters in books, on television and movies about how they are feeling. Is the bunny sad? Is the alligator mad? Do this often and seek out opportunities to discuss the many kinds of feelings there are.

Talk about your feelings as well. Mommy is so happy when you potty on the pot! Daddy is so proud when you share your toys! Place MORE emphasis on positive feelings than negative ones. Are you happy about the picture you drew? Are you excited to go see Grandma? Singing songs about being happy and showing kindness toward others instills positive values on these young impressionable minds.

As the opportunities present themselves, encourage your child to talk about his feelings. With negative feelings, this can be a bit difficult if the child is already upset, so take a few minutes to let him calm down, then ask him if he is mad. Ask him if he was frustrated about his toy not working right. It is comforting to young children if they know they can go to Mom and talk about how they are feeling. Talking specifically about what is upsetting helps children understand the differences between sadness, anger, frustration, and jealousy.

Helping kids learn to identify their feelings helps them to know themselves better as they grow, which leads to a healthier self image in youth and adulthood.

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