How to Emotionally Prepare for Deployment

Whether you are a seasoned military wife with ten deployments down, or if this is your first one ever, it is necessary to get as much information as to what is normal, and what isn’t. Deployments are a part of our lives as military wives and something we all need to get used to. Preparing your kids and yourself for a deployment is crucial to surviving the military lifestyle.

What to Expect Before Deployment

For anyone who has ever gone through a deployment, you probably have a set routine or list of things to expect. Many couples start to bicker more about little things that don’t really matter. Some just start overwhelming themselves with chores and things to do that matter more than their spouse. Others try to spend as much time together as possible before the deployment. Whatever your style is, recognize that all of these strategies are normal and that every family should recognize and accept their own strategy.

Accept Your Husband’s Enthusiasm to Deploy

Servicemembers train to deploy. That is their job. Training an entire lifetime and never getting to deploy is actually a nightmare for many, and not a perk of the job like many wives would think. It isn’t uncommon for a servicememner to be excited to deploy. Don’t be offended by this. It is important that your spouse leave happy and ready to do his job. If he isn’t focused, not only will he have a bad deployment, but morale can plummet within the unit. If your spouse’s job is in combat, they need to be focused, need to be excited, and cannot afford to have an angry family back home. Your enthusiasm is just as important as his enthusiasm for the unit.

Acknowledging Your Own Feelings Before Deployment

It is ok to be mad, just make sure you’re being productive with your feelings and find positive outlets for those feelings. There are many resources to deal with your emotions. You can talk to other wives who have been there before, you can talk to your FRG leadership, or your Ombudsman. There are also great counseling resources on base or out in town in any military community that are aware of the stressors of being a military wife.

Using MilitaryOneSource for Counseling

MilitaryOneSource is available 24 hours a day 365 days a year. Every person that answers a phone call has a MA in Counseling or similar and is ready to take on any phone call. They can set you up with a counselor in your area and they pay for 12 sessions per counselor per issue. It is a wonderful resource unique to military spouses and everything is confidential.

Preparing for deployment never gets easier. It may even get harder as the years go by and as kids get older. Being a military wife is the hardest job in any branch of service and it is crucial to stay healthy for yourself and your family. Make sure to attend the commands pre-deployment meeting and get connected with as many of the wives as you can. It is also a great time to gain valuable information about the resources the base offers to wives.

Carmen Grant is a proud combat military wife and mother of two toddlers. She is the Family Readiness Group President for her husband’s command, and volunteers at the Navy Marine-Corps Relief Society as a financial caseworker. She also writes about foreign policy, parenting, fundraising, and fitness at Suite101.

Related posts:

1. How to Create a Deployment Countdown
2. Deployment Survival Tips for Working Military Moms
3. Holiday Deployment Survival Tips for Military Moms
4. How to Help Your Children Emotionally Prepare for Summer Camp and New Summer Activities
5. Communicating with Your Military Spouse During Deployment