Since it is soon back to school time again, which means getting back to the routine, it is also a good time to put into place a chore or responsibility chart for our children. If you already have one, you may need to simply remind them of it and “dust it off” a bit after the more relaxed summer schedule.
Chores not only help us out with the family work load, but also give our children a sense of responsibility and consequently builds a strong work ethic and confidence. So, don’t feel bad about dividing the chores among the kids if they huff and puff about it. Just remind yourself that you are building their character and making them more prepared for the world around them.
Keys to Success:
1. Be clear about what to do and how to do it. You will most likely have to show how to do it first, then help your child the next time and lastly, supervise them doing it before letting them do it on their own.
2. Don’t expect your children to do all chores perfectly or even how you would do them. Let them do things their way and take pride in it. Otherwise, they will not feel adequate and resist helping out.
3. Tell your children that you need “their help” and ask them what chores they would like to do. This will instill accountability and they will be more likely to follow-through with their chores. Of course, it may not be possible for each child to do only those chores they want. But, giving them a choice of two chores gives them some of the control in the process too.
4. Praise them for their efforts and guide them, if they need it. But, don’t correct them constantly. (See #1)
5. Being consistent with chore expectations is key. For this reason, a magnetic chart, dry erase board or written document (click here for example) on the fridge of their weekly chores is so critical for success. If they see it, they cannot deny it. For smaller kids who can’t read, put pictures for each chore and explain each before posting it.
6. Most experts agree that allowance should not be given for household chores since everyone should be expected to pitch in. But, for the younger kids, giving stickers at the end of the day and special treats at the end of the week, rewards them for listening and following the rules. For the bigger kids, if there is extra work to be done, such as raking, washing windows, babysitting, washing cars etc., then that work can be rewarded with money. For more information on allowance, see my earlier article regarding allowance and teaching money management.
7. On the flip side, there should be stated and understood consequences for not doing chores. But, be a little flexible too. Sometimes, things happen and we need to listen to our children for failure to complete their chores and not simply punish them on the spot.
Stay tuned for next week’s article on the specific age appropriate chores for children.
External resources:
About the Author: Lisa Hallas is the Type-A Mom Children Editor. She has 2 wonderful girls and is always on the look-out for more information on parenting and raising children in today’s world. She has her own blog for busy moms, Super Mom Stop.
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