Whether you are gay, straight or in-between, this Lesbian Mom Scale will help you better understand diversity within the lesbian mom community. Just as with the straight community, lesbians arrive at motherhood in a variety of ways. Find out what type of mom you are and better understand how a lesbian becomes a mom, or visa-versa.
Embrace your sexuality, and celebrate motherhood, regardless of where you land on the scale. As you more clearly define what type of lesbian mom you are, remember to celebrate it. For some it’s set in stone. For others it’s an evolutionary process, and may change at different times in their lives. The scale has been created in rainbow colors, a typical gay association, instead of numbers. This is to express that no mom type is higher or better than the others on the scale.
Red Lesbian Mom
I’m a gold star lesbian, meaning I’ve never been with a man. I didn’t need to try it, to figure out if I’m gay. I became a lesbian mom because my partner had the child through insemination, I adopted, or partnered up with a woman that already had children.
Orange Lesbian Mom
I’m a gold star lesbian, as well, never needed to be with a man to figure out I’m gay. However, I endured the pregnancy through artificial insemination to become a lesbian mom. I may also have adopted or partnered with a woman that already had children.
Yellow Lesbian Mom
I’m a gold star lesbian, never needed to be with a man to figure out if I’m gay and couldn’t stand the idea of having sperm inside me. I adopted or partnered with a woman that already had children.
Green Lesbian Mom
I have always identified as a lesbian, but was willing to have sex with a man to become a mom. I may also have adopted or partnered with a woman that already had children.
Blue Lesbian Mom
I was in relationship with a man, either married or a boyfriend when I had/adopted my children. I’ve been with men and woman. I identified as a lesbian, after becoming a mom. I may also have adopted or partnered with a woman that already had children.
Purple Lesbian Mom
I’m currently in a relationship with a man, and have children. I may or may not have had sex with a woman. Help! I am sure I’m a lesbian, how do I come out of the closet?
Pink Lesbian Mom
I’m a lesbian mom, regardless of how I came to identify as a lesbian. I may or may not have had sex with a man. Don’t be surprised when you find out my children walk on four legs or fly. I’m a lesbian that has no human children, but thinks my animals are my children. I feel very strongly that it is equivalent to having a human child, and call myself a lesbian mom.
It does not matter how you became a lesbian mom or if you are a straight mom, celebrate the motherhood you’ve been blessed with. The children are the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Motherhood is an all inclusive club, please only use this Lesbian Mom Scale to further your understanding of the different ways woman become mothers. Exclusion and superiority are not respectable traits in a mother, regardless of whether you are gay, straight or in-between. Let’s teach our children to love and respect diversity, even if we don’t understand how other’s lives came to be.
If you’re a mom, and ever wondered if other women think about women the way you do, then homosexuality may have something to do with your life. Figuring out where you land on the scale may lead to more questions for you. If you find you need or would like more information, please go to About.com: Lesbian Life.
Amanda Vagianos, Type-A-Mom Lesbian Moms Editor, is passionate about organizing, creating, and bringing people together. She does this through the Ox Babies LGBT Play Group, photography business and blog she runs. She’s a BLUE LESBIAN MOM, in case you were curious.